Do you run toward – or away from – conflict?
By Sheryl Boldt
Are you similar to most of us? Do you tend to avoid conflict rather than confront it?
I hate conflicts, especially when I feel misunderstood. A friend and I are in the middle of a disagreement. Right now, we’re both angry and eager to be heard. However, it appears that our anger, along with our conviction that we’re right, is affecting our hearing.
Venting my feelings may make me feel better in the short term, but when the Holy Spirit convicts me of my sin, I’ll feel worse than ever. Instead, I’d like to think loving thoughts about my friend. I want my attitude to reflect the unconditional love I receive from God. I’d also like to see my own ways in a truer light.
I’ll be praying Psalm 139:23-24 often. “Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (AMPC).
Isn’t this the perfect verse for my friend and me?
Could you use this verse, too? Which relationships would benefit from praying this verse? Think about your marriage, your church, your community – and especially your country.
What would happen if we invited God to examine our hearts and actions and then listened for Him to speak words of wisdom, discernment and love into our hearts?
Since we can’t change the other person (but don’t we always want to?), we can benefit from asking God to show us where we’re wrong, to reveal our own faults and point out areas we need to change.
As difficult as this is, we absolutely must choose (I emphasize “choose”) to do so in order to have mature and God-honoring relationships. Think of how it would change our communities and lead to a more united America.
This brings me to a crucial point.
As we celebrate July 4, America’s most patriotic day, I invite you, throughout the month of July, to ask God to help you see and love those you’re in conflict with as He sees and loves them. Then, extend that prayer to include those who, instead of running from conflict, seem to run toward it – those who create division over every issue. I fervently pray we’ll not only refuse to let conflict interrupt our personal relationships, but also refuse to allow it to divide us as a nation.
Rather, let us resolve to see ourselves – and each other – in a truer light.
Sheryl H. Boldt writes fiction and non-fiction for children and adults. Her devotions appear in 36+ newspapers. She is also the author of the blog, www.TodayCanBeDifferent.net. Connect with her at [email protected].
