By Barbara Britt, barbarabritt.com, [email protected]
“Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames.”
Rumi
What really worked in 2019? If we ask that question, we must also take the time to ask ourselves what AND who did not work and why. Think of it like spring-cleaning your Circle of Influence. January is a perfect month to conduct an audit of your Circle of Influence. Taking the time to reflect on who empowers you and others, who loves you unconditionally, who holds you accountable and is continually growing herself or himself, who is an integral part of personal and professional growth. Remove those who aren’t an example to you, dreaming big or working hard, and those who are sucking the life force out of you.
In training and coaching sessions, I often conduct Circle of Influence exercises where attendees list their top values and up to five people closest to them. They are encouraged to re-evaluate anyone not matched in the majority of their values.
In my experience conducting Circle of Influence exercises, many people are so afraid of not having five people in their circle that they would not remove the names of people who were actually impeding their growth, happiness, and purpose just so all the spots were filled. The best thing about moving people out of the circle is the ability to seek out better matches to bring into your circle. Here are some steps that will help you form a circle that builds you as a person purposely and intentionally.
“Surround Yourself with only those who will lift you higher.”
Oprah Winfrey
Look for those that see the greatness in you, and whom you see greatness in. Know the values you live in and Here are some tips to get started:
Identify (Your Tribe). What attitudes and skills do you seek in others and yourself?
Think of your Circle of Influence as the five people that will influence you positively and proactively.
Create your own Mastermind Group—these are people that have common purposes focused on personal and professional development. These people will challenge and encourage each other to achieve and grow.
Recruit those who love you unconditionally, but still hold you accountable.
Lastly, add people that never stop reading, growing, seeking knowledge.
Remember to check in with yourself. This needs to be done every month at first; then you can go a little longer. These are the questions you must be asking yourself:
Do you fit in your own Circle of Influence?
Are you staying in your values or making excuses?
Who are you mentoring and developing?
What changes are you willing to make in order to grow your circle?
Who do you need to replace in your circle? Make sure it is not you.
We all should be using these principles in developing new and existing relationships, and to be the same person we need for others. Walk in and develop your values so that people see you as a role model. This is the real power of creating a Circle of Influence you are proud to be an integral part of, whether it’s your own circle or someone else’s.
What a fabulous opportunity 2020 will afford you if you are willing to reflect and create a powerful circle. This is an effective exercise that can be done with your family, children, adults, church, and workplace. When we all grow and hold ourselves to high values, we will see our entire community growing.
If you want to get intentional about growing your circle and developing action steps for your next move, I would love to hear from you. Give me a call, email, or go on my website for dates and times of my training sessions classes. It is never too late to become the person we are destined to be. No one can do it alone.